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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 6:57 AMan orange tree growing in the middle of -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 7:47 AMthe desert. It had been planted there by -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:18 AMa band of traveling juggler monks who wear only the color slate. It was then -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:23 AMthey realized how baddly their wardrobe was lacking in colour. They decided to leave the desert to try to find the famed Buffalo Exchange chain of vintage clothing stores in San Francisco where they would -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:24 AMbuy ironic trucker hats and Night Rider t-shirts. Of course as a result, the spiritual life of the juggler sect -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:26 AMfell by the proverbial wayside. Clad in their new-to-them vintage fashions they had dreams that they could -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:29 AMdance to the latest Brit-pop sounds. But of course they really had no rhythm, so they ended up just drinking G&Ts until they -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:35 AMpassed out in sorid pile; and as the last now ex-juggler drifted off into a G&T scented dream, a single leaf fell from the orange tree in the desert. -
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This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 8:58 AMNo one noticed this event, but on that leaf was the most extraordinary -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:00 AMand intricate pattern,and if you looked closely (very very closely) you would see that it contained a rhyming verse that alluded to the secrets of the inner workings of -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:04 AMThe Elder Edda. Perhaps this orange tree in the middle of the desert was actually -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:18 AMproof that the Vikings had populated this part of -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:40 AMthe world many ages ago. The jugglers, although they did not yet realize it were time travelers sent to -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:48 AMverify that the Vikings drank orange juice; however, what they next discovered was that -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:57 AMyou cannot get very far in this world, even in San Francisco, if you are reeking of gin. -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 9:59 AMThis was something the Vikings hadn't discovered, as San Francisco didn't exist back then. -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 10:29 AM("The first confirmed date for the production of gin is the early 17th century in Holland, although claims have been made that it was produced prior to this in Italy. In Holland it was produced as a medicine and sold in chemist shops to treat stomach complains, gout and gallstones. To make it more palatable, the Dutch started to flavour it with juniper, which has medicinal properties of its own.")
The Vikings didn't know what they were missing. :-) But the jugglers
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 10:32 AMIt was the oracle they had consulted the day before they set sails who had told them about the city of Sanisk Friskis. -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 10:43 AMThe oracle had predicted that the monks would discover a land of great debauchery, where men behaved like women and women behaved like men, where cats and dogs lived together in -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 10:49 AM(LOL - oops - I guess I should be a little more patient with my postings)
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 10:44 AMbut slightly confused by traveling through time, they mistook San Francisco to be the mythical Sanisk Friskis when they sat in the desert, beneath the orange tree, and plotted their journey. -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 10:51 AM"The oracle had predicted that the monks would discover a land of great debauchery, where men behaved like women and women behaved like men, where cats and dogs lived together in ...
homes and lay about like throw pillows, and only 2 choices of political parties prevailed. That was all about to change because -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 11:20 AMAt that very moment, Zaliton, the overlord of the Juggler order decided that he'd made a big mistake.
He shouted for his pro-counsel 'Bring me -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 12:28 PMmy balls! They looked at him funny. He realized what he had said, and -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 1:18 PMhe had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing, but alas, the damage was done! The counsel errupted with giggles and guffaws - now he would have to -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, July 27, 2004 - 2:15 PMexplain he meant his testicles, and not the ones he usually threw in the air.
His juggling balls were the funniest you have ever seen, so funny that he was banned from using them apart from at war for fear of the people around him -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 6:59 AMwould die laughing. And so he walked to -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:01 AMa small grassy area where there was a monument put up to -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:09 AMcommemorate the war between the sexes...a war that had ended years before but had left so many things unresloved with so many MIAs that there were still hard feelings on both sides. It was -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:10 AMhard to say who one the war, or even why it started, some historians said it was because of a simple misundersstanding, and if you don't know what it is, I'm not going to tell you. Others said it was because -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:18 AMTheresa Heinz Kerry got the women of the world too riled up following a speech at the Democratic Convention in the year 2004 in which she implored women to stand up and take pride in themselves like never before. her speech was largely responsible for her husband's capture of 90% of the female vote in the election that year, but the trouble began brewing shortly after his inauguration -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:21 AMceremony commenced, when SHE stepped forward to swear the oath. That was when -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:30 AMLaura Bush, who was sitting next to her husband, the outgoing president, nudged him with a vicious jab to the side, and said very loudly -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 9:13 AM, "dammit, george, get up there and do something!" to which the bumbling George approached Theresa and held out his hand for a shake. Theresa looked at the extended hand with a blank stare and then looked up at GWB and said, in a strange mixture of italian, french, portugese and english,
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, July 28, 2004 - 7:31 AM(LOL (you go boys!)) -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sat, August 14, 2004 - 7:04 PM"Good day Mister President. You are much shorter in person! I fear they may have to re-adjust the podium for you!". He looked dejectedly towards the love of his life and knew in his heart of hearts -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sat, August 14, 2004 - 8:19 PMthat dick cheney was probably tired of doing things for him anymore...and that, if truth be known, he was tired of having the dick impose his will upon him. All of a sudden, he started to recall some of the may policies he would have done differently had that damn dick and donald not been around. perhaps most obviously, he would have -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sun, August 15, 2004 - 7:35 PMpicked a woman to be vice president. The last remaining juggler heard all this and exclaimed rather loudly -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Mon, August 16, 2004 - 7:34 PM"Oh hear ye, oh hear ye! The little man speaks even rarer words of wisdom!" and the crowd -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Mon, August 16, 2004 - 7:39 PMsuddenly stilled. All heads turned toward the little man and then -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Mon, August 16, 2004 - 7:43 PMhe said "so what have you got to say for yourself? Hmmm!". The little man replied "Please don't look at me! It haunts me even now! I still have nightmares of Florida!". The crowd grew restless -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, August 17, 2004 - 3:40 PMand suddenly the little man was gone. Only a tiny heap of ashes stood in his place. The crowd became more restless and with no one to vent their rage upon grew unruly and began to -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, August 17, 2004 - 4:24 PMconvert to Islam right in front of George's eyes! He always felt he was losing the war abroad but this?! It was too much to bear -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Mon, August 23, 2004 - 10:08 PMso he did what he did best in times of extreme stress ... he closed his eyes, put his fingers in his ears, and chanted "lalalalala..." while -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, August 24, 2004 - 2:15 AMstill trying to make it look like he was still in control (he always was the one for theatrics). Mrs Bush hollared -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, August 24, 2004 - 6:41 PM"Get down from there Georgie, you still have to -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, August 24, 2004 - 6:44 PMwin more votes! What did i see in you, i'll never know!"
A, now, desperate president was showing his true colours and -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Thu, February 23, 2006 - 10:07 PMrealized that he was chromatically challenged .. he decided he should check into .. -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sun, February 26, 2006 - 10:40 AMthe nearest, high security insane asylum...the only place he has ever felt he truly belonged. But alas upon checking into this asylum... -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Mon, March 20, 2006 - 7:33 PMhe changed his mind and arranged to leave, but as he opened the doors (or had them opened for him) a large horde of anti-war fanatics jeered him while the press took zoom photographs from outside the gates. the peasantry had somehow gotten wind of his secret place and their leeches were on the scent. with a frustrated sigh, he turned and went back into the asylum and called for a helicopter. he went up to the roof to wait... -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Fri, April 21, 2006 - 6:42 PMand saw... the sky opening into a flourescent blue, swirling cyclone. Everything round about seemed to blink in and out -- for just a moment -- and all matter seemed to sway as if on a breeze. Then a red, shiny ship appeared from the center... -
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Unsu...
Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, May 2, 2006 - 2:40 AMthat strangely resembled a large elephantine powerbase, and only then he finally knew that his dreams of a permanent Republican Majority was closer to reality than was once thought. "huh..well since i'm the Decider, i decide that voting is an inconvenience best left to idealogues and dreamers! Leave the real decisions to me!.. Uh..now where were we.....hmmm....uh-huh". The masses reeled in horror at the prospect of -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Tue, May 23, 2006 - 9:16 AMhim actually making any decision that they might be expected to have to follow. And another orange leaf fell silently from the tree while he silently struggled inside his head, trying to decide what it was he was going to decide about. -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sat, May 27, 2006 - 10:23 PMThen it all became clear. He would start a circus side show and collect as many circus freaks as he could find. What was required was not just freaks, but 100% bona fide freaks guaranteed to -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sun, May 28, 2006 - 12:07 PMto have indepth and infinite knowledge of the Republican party and all it's workings, as well possessing many obscure talents to thrill and mesmerize the masses. He was totally lost in his thoughts of delightfully freakish world domination when... -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sun, May 28, 2006 - 2:40 PMa knock was heard on his door. He opened the door and in walked Dick Cheney, Donnie Rumsfeld and Saddam Hussein. They were all dressed in hunting gear and quickly invited all the bona fide freaks to come along on their hunting expedition..... -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Sun, May 28, 2006 - 2:54 PM(Oh no! Did they not realize the potentially perilous situation they were about to step into?) One by one the freaks ... -
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Re: Once upon a time there was ...
Wed, August 23, 2006 - 7:50 AMturned on a dime (where they got all those dimes, we may never know) and shouted
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